Conversations with Critters Presents Chapter 18 of The Case of the Jumping Gene
Walk with the animals. Talk with the animals. And the highly anticipated release of Chapter 18 of The Case of the Jumping Gene...
Today Critters, we are at a critical plot point with the release of Chapter 18 of The Case of the Jumping Gene. Brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!
Previously! After the veteran villain, Busby Bubbs, outmaneuvered our Detectives with the cat righting reflex, he pulled another disappearing act. Temporarily.
Now! Are we still on track to catch the thief? Question mark. Question mark.
Please! Welcome our Core Community Critters Jasper Kitten, Chris and Jojo in excellent take down critter commentary and conversation. Take it away!
Jasper: Dear Gentle Critters, we can’t, we just can’t let him get away! I’ve got a plan with a little, or a lot, of help from our friends.
Chris: Dear Gentle Readers, we’re all ears.
Jojo: Cuff ‘em, Critters. And let’s read. All. About. It.
THE CASE OF THE JUMPING GENE
BOOK 3 FROM THE J KITTEN, SLEUTH & PURVEYOR OF BRIGHT SHINY OBJECTS DETECTIVE AGENCY
BY JASPER KITTEN, CHRIS, JOJO AND STAR IN HEAVEN FUREVER AND EVER
DEDICATED IN LUVLUVLUVING MEMORY OF STAR
CHAPTER 18
HERD MENTALITY
Padding over to a pile of fleece in the textile barn, the Critters detected the odoriferous drift of fish. In a psy ops maneuver, they continued walking past it, toward the end of the row and gave the intent and the appearance that they had missed the obvious.
“Critters,” cried Jasper Kitten, “if my instincts serve me correctly, I believe that Busby Bubbs has secreted himself in a pile of fleece down this way. Please. Proceed.”
“Why, I’m gonna flush that Bubbs outta here. Wait until I get my toebeans on him,” growled Chris in an overly loud and overtly proud overture. “C’mon, Critters, he’s gotta be further down this way.”
“Roger that!” bark bark barked Jojo.
“Gosh, we sure are getting close to cracking this case all the way open, all the way down here!” barked Star with her can do Chihuahua attitude.
“Permission to speak,” saluted Clementine.
“Permission granted,” approved Jasper Kitten as they all set their sights on the specific location of the fleece stacked in the distance.
“Critters, when Petal and I were in Officer Training School, we learned about the power of detection in splitting up and going your own way,” she explained.
“Your expository description of this investigative strategy is of great evidentiary value in locating the elusive Busby Bubbs, Clementine and Petal,” Jasper Kitten replied, playing along, vying for time. “Therefore, at this critical juncture, I suggest that we utilize this methodology and all split up and fan out again throughout the textile barn in search of this incredible veteran villain. I will now map out the plan.”
The Detectives leaned in and huddled. Jasper Kitten dropped his voice into a hushed mew and gave his actual and factual instructions.
“Clearly, at this critical juncture, we are not going anywhere. We need to stick together now more than ever. We are so close to cracking the case. This will come as a completely counterintuitive ploy to Busby Bubbs and his sneaky self-centered way of thinking, but I am confident in our abilities. We can and we must mislead him while he hides in plain sight,” confirmed Jasper Kitten.
They made a show of ambling further away from the specific location where they were quite sure of the hiding place of Bubsy Bubbs and went through the motions of digging through the stacks, all the while keeping a covert watch of their target.
And they did not have to wait long for their surreptitious strategy to pay off. A clandestine shift in a particular stack of white wool captured their immediate attention. Toebean by almost imperceptible toebean, a white cat emerged from the camouflaged circumstance and stalked toward the barn door without a backwards glance.
“Gosh, Jasper Kitten,” whispered Star, “we can’t let him get away!”
“Trust me on this, Star,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “Trust. Me. On. This.”
“Of course, Jasper Kitten. Not everything meets the eye in this case,” she clasped her cinnamon brown paws together.
“Why, the Bubbs sure is over confident in my humble opinion of the investigative matter,” growled Chris, very very low.
“Correct, Chris. We can count on Busby Bubbs being too confident of a con. It won’t be long now,” calculated Jasper Kitten. “He only has a few more steps to the barn door. And. His. Own. Undoing.”
The J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency crouched down, poised on each and every toebean while they observed Busby Bubbs make his final decisive move. He slipped beyond the barn door and took the first step outside.
“Jojo, do you have the appropriate bright shiny object at your rapid disposal?” queried Jasper Kitten.
“Roger, Jasper Kitten,” replied Jojo, resting a paw on the cuffs.
“Prepare to make a citizen’s arrest, “ instructed Jasper Kitten.
“Roger that,” barked Jojo under his breath and tightened his grip.
“Critters, go go go!” cried Jasper Kitten with the paws up signal.
With Jasper Kitten in the lead, the Detectives ran flat out and covered the distance to the barn door in record time. And that is where they stopped, for right ahead of them was Busby Bubbs. Frozen in the snow.
Fiona and Charlotte bore down on him along with their ninety-eight companions, all in close and collective proximity to one another. Each and every one of the former and now transformed Rufus Subsets One to One Hundred surrounded Busby Bubbs.
“You. Are. Elusive. No. More,” called Fiona.
Busby Bubbs retreated a step from her, but only to be confronted again and this time by Jasper Kitten himself.
“Your number has come up, Bubbs,” Jasper Kitten strode into the center of the Ginormous Group and right up to Busby Bubbs, flanked by the Detectives.
“Jasper Kitten, the Orange striped sleuth. A natural domestic feline mutant if ever there was one,” smiled Busby Bubbs. “Yes. Emphasis on natural. Or is it emphasis on mutant?”
“Emphasize whatever you want, Bubbs,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “But. However. You might want to take a look around you. Or. Have you lost your situational awareness?”
Fiona, Charlotte and their friends pressed in.
“Yes, I see the fodder surrounding me. Well, I simply walked out of the textile barn due to the scratchy poor quality of the alpaca wool,” he sniffed and brushed off strands of alpaca fleece that strayed from his white coat. “Such a trifling place with all of those tattered piles.”
“I beg to differ, Bubbs. You’re the pile,” mewed Jasper Kitten.
“Go ahead and beg, Jasper Kitten, go ahead and beg. You’re known for being oppositional. Such. A. Nuisance,” scolded Busby Bubbs.
“Speak. For. Yourself. Bubbs,” replied Jasper Kitten, making eye contact with Jojo and his paw on the cuffs.
“Fur. Sure,” Busby Bubbs brushed off another strand of alpaca fleece and blew on his toebean.
“You won’t escape, Bubbs. There’s no way out. You’re a done deal, you con,” added Jasper Kitten.
“Whatever, Jasper Kitten. Now listen to me, Rufus Sub One through Rufus Sub One Hundred. You all looked a heck of a lot better when you were Orange,” opined Busby Bubbs.
“We have names not numbers, Bubbs,” asserted Fiona.
“Of course you do,” shrugged Busby Bubbs.
One by one by one in a rising melodic chorus, the Ginormous Group took turns and called out their names.
“Vinnie. Oscar. Smokey. Charlie. Alfonse. Armando. Millie. Oliver. Lucy. Angel. Bella. Stella. Chloe. Sophie. Baby. Eddie. Maggie. Lily. Patches. Violet. Felix. Felicity. Gismo. Luna. Gira. Nigel. George. Leo. Bianca. Tilly. Kai. Peaches. Smooch. Mooch. Seymour. Luke. Lance. Spot. Henry. Mimi. Carmine. Buddy. Jonny. Percy. Jimmy. Timmy. Tommy. Teddy. Lala. Sabrina. Coco. Mojo. Milo. Brewster. Frankie. Cooper. Boo. Pepper. Ziggy. Wiggy. Biggy. Figgy. Jiggy. Tiggy. Merlin. Rocky. Gus. Phoebe. Olive. Marley. Maya. Binky. Basil. Nala. Winston. Freddy. Reddy. Toby. Ruby. Sage. Petunia. Flower. Monty. Aster. Callie. Alley. Benny. Lenny. Penny. Gigi. Taylor. Tyler. Autumn. Primo. Cole. Muffy. Buffy. Tuffy.”
“Please, I’d give you a standing ovation, but you’re all much much easier to keep track of as an integer not an individual. You could even be called a zero,” snorted Busby Bubbs into the snow. “Really. You bore me. To. Tears.”
“Gosh, Busby Bubbs,” barked Star, the light flashing in her eyes, “you are not a very nice person!”
He started to hiss, but then cowered as Sassafras, with Perpetua riding on her back, stood tall and herded the alpacas up to the edge of the group. Further back still, Sir Skipper and the sled dogs stood their ground and the barncats followed suit and held the perimeter.
“Do you see all of us as fodder now, Bubbs?” asked Jasper Kitten.
“But of course,” he retorted.
“Cuff him, Jojo,” instructed Jasper Kitten. “Sir Skipper has a specially outfitted sled to transport Busby Bubbs to the slammer.”
“Roger, Jasper Kitten. It is my sworn duty to escort you to the slammer, Busby Bubbs,” bark bark barked Jojo. “And. My. Distinct. Pleasure.”
Busby Bubbs remained expressionless, remorseless, as Jojo pulled his paws behind his back and clamped down on the cuffs. A narrow passageway opened between the crowd of Critters and Jojo, followed by Clementine and Petal, pressed forward with the apprehended Busby Bubbs.
Cries and shouts rang out as the procession proceeded.
“Beat it, Bubbs!”
“So long, Bubbs!”
“Don’t let the barn door hit you on the way out, Bubbs!”
“Buh-bye boring, Bubbs! Buh-bye! Buh-bye!” chanted Perpetua.
“Good luck warming up in the slammer, Bubbs! Cuz! You’ve got ice. In. Your. Veins!”
“Enjoy being a cog in the system, Bubbs!”
“You’re one sorry excuse for a Critter, Bubbs!”
Reaching the specially outfitted sled, Jojo loaded Busby Bubbs into the cabin and locked the gate. Together with Clementine and Petal, he hopped up onto the sled to keep watch on the way to the slammer and, under Sir Skipper’s command, mushed.
The sleds pulled away and sped out of sight and silence fell over the farm. Jasper Kitten turned to address the Ginormous Group as they lingered and milled about.
“My friends, I shall no longer say one through one hundred, but I shall say one and all. My friends, may I have your attention, please.”
A calm settled over them and a hush and they tuned in to the Orange striped sleuth who stood resolute and patient in their midst.
“My friends! You have travelled long and far and wide in the Mt. Bachelor Wilderness. Most of all, as well, you have travelled long and far and wide in your very own lives. The journey is incredible and has brought you home to the Alpaca Farm. Furever!” he cried.
“Thank you!” they cheered. “Thank you, Jasper Kitten! Thank you, J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency! You’ve saved us! You’ve saved us!”
The cheers and celebratory cries rang out across the land and it was several minutes that elapsed before Jasper Kitten could even hope to continue to address them.
He raised a white gloved paw.
“Your sacrifice has not gone unnoticed. Truly, you have saved yourselves. You knew to ask for help. You have made an invaluable contribution to the scientific community of domestic cats and, furthermore, you have been of service with tremendous grace under pressure.”
“We couldn’t have done it without you no matter what you say, Jasper Kitten!” called Charlotte.
“We luvluvluv you and the entire J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!” called Fiona. “All of your Clients have said so!”
“Thank you. On behalf of my agency, we always say, we luvluvluv you back,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “And contrary to what Busby Bubbs had to say, you all look amazing in your very own natural condition.”
Cheers rang out over and over and Jasper Kitten again raised his white gloved paw.
“You are all purrfect just the way you are,” he concluded.
Jasper Kitten bowed and gave the paws up signal to Chris and Star who embraced him while one massive purr filled the air.
“Why, my instincts serve me correctly when I say, it’s time to build a Catio,” growled Chris, loud and proud.
“Correct. Chris. Please. Proceed,” agreed Jasper Kitten.
🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾
Poetry with Pets
Lean in and huddle
Actual and factual
Let’s cuff ‘em Critters
By Jasper Kitten, Chris and Jojo
Critters! Catch up on all of the mystery and adventure with The Case of the Jumping Gene! Book Number 3! Brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!
Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5🐾Chap. 6🐾Chap. 7🐾Chap. 8🐾Chap. 9🐾Chap. 10🐾Chap. 11🐾Chap. 12🐾Chap. 13🐾Chap. 14🐾Chap. 15🐾Chap. 16
The Case of the Bowled Over Bowler Hat! Book Number 2!
Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5🐾Chap. 6🐾Chap.7🐾Chap. 8🐾Chap. 9🐾Chap. 10🐾Chap. 11🐾Chap. 12🐾Chap. 13🐾Chap. 14🐾Chap. 15🐾Chap. 16🐾Chap. 17🐾Chap. 18🐾Chap. 19🐾Chap. 20
The Case of the Misplaced Priority Envelope! Book Number 1!
Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5🐾Chap. 6🐾Chap. 7🐾Chap. 8🐾Chap. 9🐾Chap. 10🐾Chap. 11🐾Chap. 12🐾Chap. 13🐾Chap.14🐾Chap. 15🐾Chap. 16🐾Chap. 17🐾Chap. 18🐾Chap. 19🐾Chap. 20
The Case of the Misplaced Priority Envelope
Bubsy Bubs on the way to the slammer, and the cats are happy, free and beautiful as they are.
What a lovely chapter!
Thanks, Heidi and critters.
Oh my gosh my FAVORITE 🙌🏻 The list of names! The back and forth with Bubsy Bubs at the end 😭 You are so clever friend!