Conversations with Critters

Walk with the animals. Talk with the animals. And the highly anticipated release of Chapter 6 of The Case of the Jumping Gene!

Today Critters, we are back with the highly anticipated release of Chapter 6 of The Case of the Jumping Gene! And you’ve got that right! All brought to you by the incredible J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!

Previously! In a scientific experimental marvel, Jasper Kitten catalyzed and synthesized the necessary solution to reverse bioengineer the genetic mutation that had turned all of the labcats Orange.

Now! With the Rufus Subsets restored to their natural coat colors, it’s time for our Critter Detectives to move on to the next stage of the investigation and escape from the Bio Lab!

Please! Join our Core Community Critters, Jasper Kitten, Chris and Jojo in excellent experimental critter commentary and conversation! Take. It. Away!

Jasper: Hello and welcome back to the story, Dear Gentle Critters and Dear Gentle Readers!

Chris: Jasper, you are the only Orange cat left in the room. Beyond that, it’s time to eat.

Jasper: True, Chris. All true. Both biodiversity and mealtime have been restored.

Jojo: And now, with all of my years of experience in Ginormous Group Rescue, let us get ready, get set, and go go go!

THE CASE OF THE JUMPING GENE

BOOK 3 FROM THE J KITTEN, SLEUTH & PURVEYOR OF BRIGHT SHINY OBJECTS DETECTIVE AGENCY

BY JASPER KITTEN, CHRIS, JOJO AND STAR IN HEAVEN FUREVER AND EVER

DEDICATED IN LUVLUVLUVING MEMORY OF STAR

CHAPTER 6

JUMP START

Chris pressed the full strength and dexterity of his toebeans against the storage room door. It yielded easily under the finesse of his touch.

“Why, there’s no better inner sanctum than finding stacks upon stacks of big bags of kibble,” he growled, loud and proud, stepping into the vast space.

Metal racks surrounded him, stocked floor to ceiling with standard laboratory issue cat chow. Chris gave a nod in the affirmative as he calculated a grand total of one ton, a supply to meet the minimalist needs over a very long-term timeframe for critters in confinement.

“Why, the Bio Lab could feed a lot more cats than one to ninety-nine,” he shuddered to himself.

A flatbed cart rested against the far wall. Chris strode over to it and began loading the bags of kibble. He kept up a steady pace with an efficiency driven by his innate and instinctive understanding of the hunger pains of the Ginormous Group and their restricted caloric intake.

He leaned into the cart and set the wheels in motion with a creak and a squeak, rolling into the corridor and back to the laboratory. As he entered the doorway, Clementine and Petal bounded over to him and helped guide the heavy load over to the workbench.

The beakers had all been cleared away, washed and set to dry on a rack by the sink.

“KP Duty complete,” they saluted Chris.

“Thank you, Officers Clementine and Petal. You have taken the initiative and responsibility without needing to be asked,” praised Chris.

In place of the beakers on the workbench were now stacks of small glass plates. 

“Officers Clementine and Petal, it’s chow time!” bark bark barked Jojo.

“Roger, Ret. Sgt. Det. Jojo,” they responded at attention.

Chris set to work with his retractable claws extended from his toebeans and open open opened a bag of kibble.  Clementine and Petal held out the plates one by one and Chris scooped up heaping portions.

“I must note, Chris,” commented Jasper Kitten, “Rufus Sub One through Niney-nine are accustomed, in their digestive systems, to an unfortunate caloric restriction. If they eat too much at once they may suffer from indigestion. Our next steps in escaping to safety could potentially be impeded by gastrointestinal upset.”

Jasper Kitten’s cautionary tale hung in the air and Chris took a brief moment to consider the ramifications of overeating so early on in the rescue effort.

“Officers Clementine and Petal, please cut the portions in half and distribute the plates accordingly,” directed Chris.

“Copy,” they said.

The Canine Unit, Star and Jojo, organized the Ginormous Group into a line.

“Attention, Ginormous Group,” bark bark barked Jojo, “the serving of portion appropriate plates of kibble will now proceed. We ask that you maintain an orderly manner throughout the meal, although we recognize that you are quite understandably ravenous.”

Star held out a cinnamon brown paw and directed Rufus Sub One to step forward, but she stood still in her Tuxedo coat, reluctant to move until the light of recognition flashed in Star’s eyes.

“You are free to proceed. No levers and no green lights are required. Not now. Not ever again,” soothed Star.

“Thank you, Star,” replied Rufus Sub One, stepping forward and accepting the plate held out by Clementine. “Thank you very much.”

“Rufus Sub One through Ninety-nine,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “Please, eat at a slow but steady pace. I realize the depths of your hunger, but we are planning to provide you with small frequent meals so as not to shock your systems as you reacclimate to a normal daily caloric intake. We need each and every one of you to be nourished, but we especially need you to be light on your feet for the next steps. To. Evacuate. You. To. Safety.”

Ninety-nine plates later, the Ginormous Group huddled in the laboratory, the aroma of kibble beyond enticing. They chowed down together slowly slowly and a new sense of satisfaction spread among them, a shared feeling, surprising and welcome.

While they ate, Jasper Kitten gave the paws up to the Critter Detectives and they conferred and concurred on the next stage of the investigation, paying close attention in particular to Jojo and all of his career experience in Ginormous Group Rescue.

“Retired Sergeant Detective Jojo, after all of your career experience as a Sheriff with a specialty in Ginormous Group Rescue, I must ask that you please weigh in on the next best means of escaping from the Bio Lab and moving Rufus Sub One through Ninety-nine to safety,” requested Jasper Kitten.

“I appreciate your faith and confidence in my abilities, Jasper Kitten,” replied Jojo. “It is my honor since retirement from the Sheriff’s Department to be a part of your esteemed detective agency, generally, and the Canine Unit with Star, specifically.”

“Of course,” mewed Jasper Kitten with a bow of his furrowed brow. “Since joining the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency on the heels of your long and storied career in Law Enforcement, you have proven yourself to be indispensable to our investigations. Now, in the basement level of the Bio Lab, we are at a critical juncture. What is your recommendation?”

“Jasper Kitten, in my professional opinion of the matter, the sooner we get out of here, the better. Full stop,” Jojo replied without hesitation. 

“What about the weather as a factor?” pressed Jasper Kitten.

“Even with the snowfall, I have a few options at our disposal that could work very well. We also have the advantage of being under the cover of darkness for a few more hours. I suggest that we leave with the Ginormous Group at once,” confirmed Jojo.

“Gosh, Jasper Kitten, if I may be so bold as to point out that none of the Rufus Subsets has ever stepped foot outside of the Bio Lab,” commented Star with her can do Chihuahua attitude.

“Yes, I see, Star,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “Your point is well taken, for in fact they are not even Indoor Only Cats.”

“Why, not even remotely,” growled Chris, low and slow. “They have never experienced the efficiency of an automatic feeder much less the basic rights of regular snacks and meals.”

“Correct, Chris. They have only known cages and having their true natures experimented on. They have not known Catios and the gentle breeze that filters through the screen on a warm day.”

Jojo listened intently to the exchange and spoke after much consideration of the circumstance surrounding them.

“A socialization period will be necessary for this Ginormous Group to enter a normal domestic lifestyle. We must remain focused on escaping the Bio Lab first and foremost, but this glimpse into their future lives is also imperative to a successful overall rescue operation.” Jojo looked to Jasper Kitten.

“If my instincts serve me correctly, Critters, we can start by giving the Rufus Subset One through Ninety-nine individual names instead of numbers. With. Their. Permission,” said Jasper Kitten and swatted the air with a white gloved paw. 

“Jasper Kitten, I would like to propose that we proceed in stages with an evacuation plan that involves an integral part of the natural and wild mountainous environment,” barked Jojo.

“We’re all ears, Jojo,” replied Jasper Kitten. “Detectives, let us stay tuned and follow Jojo’s lead on this.”

“Thank you, Jasper Kitten,” barked Jojo.

“Jojo, by any chance, are you alluding to the system of Lava Caves that are hidden in the nearby volcanic wilderness, but close to the Bio Lab?”

“Affirmative, Jasper Kitten. For the first stage in evacuation to safety, we have our car under your expert driving skills, so we can shuttle the Rufus Subsets in small groups. According to my best estimate with the remaining hours before sunrise, we have enough time to make this happen in an efficient and straightforward systematic way.”

“Gosh, Jojo,” barked Star, “how many Rufus Subsets per trip are you suggesting? The car comfortably fits the entire J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency, a total of six of us, but we could be making an awful lot of trips with ninety-nine cats as passengers.”

“Your point is well thought out, Star,” commented Jasper Kitten while Jojo ran the numbers on a sheet of paper. “Critters, we need to seriously consider upgrading to a minivan in the future of the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency.”

“Why, that’s a well thought out and great idea, Jasper Kitten,” growled Chris, low and slow.

“Gosh, if we continue to encounter cases with Ginormous Groups, that would really be the way to go,” agreed Star.

Jojo looked up from his calculations and the Detectives turned their full attention to him.

“According to the long division and a doubling of our usual six passenger seating capacity to twelve passengers max, we can get out of here in eight-point-two-five trips. Rounding down, we can approximate eight trips or rounding up up up, nine trips tops,” ascertained Jojo.

“It’s reasonable, Jojo,” agreed Jasper Kitten. “Both you and Star have made a valid point and I must take into account all of her years of life experience in addition to your tried and true career as a first responder. But we must not sacrifice individual safety for the sake of the group evacuation. What if we, in fact, need to make more trips?”

“If time allows, Jasper Kitten. If. Time. Allows,” urged Jojo.

“Why, we’d better get ready and set to go go go, Jasper Kitten,” prompted Chris.

Jasper Kitten paced around the laboratory, sizing up the group capacity and how to fit everyone into the car with the greatest and safest expedience. Rufus Sub One stepped over to him. 

“If you don’t mind my saying so, Jasper Kitten,” she whispered, “the Rufus Subsets are conditioned to be crammed into a cage. The car ride, however cramped it may be, is a small sacrifice on our part for the sake of our safety and freedom.”

“Thank you, Rufus Sub One. Your sacrifice at this critical juncture of your rescue is most worthy of our every investigative effort put forth to ensure your safety and freedom as you have noted.”

“Thank you for listening to me, Jasper Kitten,” she said.

“Critters. We will proceed at full capacity in the car,” he declared.

“On behalf of each and every Rufus Subset, I can assure you that we are ready, Jasper Kitten,” she replied.

“Purrfect. Thank you, Rufus Sub One. Please, wait here and conserve your energy. We have a plan.” 

Jasper Kitten proceeded to hold a cartographic consultation with Star who clasped and grasped the drawing of the maze, the map of the Bio Lab floorplan, in her cinnamon brown paws. 

“Star, Rufus Sub One knows the entire layout of the Bio Lab, but I do not wish to separate her out from the rest of the group and further tax her energy. When we got here, you were able to identify the location of the entrance from the drawing of the maze, from the map.”

“Gosh, Jasper Kitten, the drawing certainly has proven to be an invaluable clue to the investigation,” barked Star.

“Is that staircase the only way in and out? Where is the nearest exit?” queried Jasper Kitten.

“Chris was very close to it when he discovered the storage room of kibble. The exit is to the immediate left of the storage room and connects with the staircase where we gained entrance. Follow this route back to the parking lot,” outlined Star, peering through the up close range of her progressive lenses.

Jasper Kitten gave the paws up signal to Jojo and then motioned to Chris.

“Rufus Sub One through Ninety-nine,” announced Jasper Kitten. “Chris and I will advance to our car and prepare to transport you to safety. The Canine Unit, Star and Jojo, with the assistance of Officers Clementine and Petal will help organize this rescue phase of the investigation. Please, cooperate to the fullest extent as you will be grouped into smaller subsets. Furthermore, please allow me to assure you that you will all be reunited very soon.”

He strode from the laboratory with Chris, projecting a portrait of confidence and calm, but once clear of the room, they broke into a run and sprinted toward the exit.

Meanwhile, back at the car now buried in snow, they worked in rapid tandem teamwork with their toebeans to clear away the accumulation. Jasper Kitten hopped into the driver’s seat and revved the engine only to hear a hollow click from the ignition. He pumped the gas pedal and tried again.

“Chris, I’ve got nothing!” he cried.

“Try it again, Jasper Kitten!” growled Chris, loud and proud. “The engine must be cold from the freezing temps!”

Jasper Kitten gunned the engine, but still it did not whimper nor did it cough much less roar to life.

“Nada!” wailed Jasper Kitten. 

“I’ve got the right tool for the job!” cried Chris, hopping out of the car. “I don’t ride shotgun for nothin! Pop the trunk open open open!”

Chris ran around to the back of the car and brushed snow from the trunk with one sweeping motion of his toebeans. He flung the lid open wide, rummaging through the emergency roadside kit, and yanked out a battery powered jump starter.

“Pop the hood open open open, Jasper Kitten and loan me your headlamp!” he cried again and bounded through the snow. 

Taking a thorough look under the hood, Chris cried out in shock and alarm.

“The battery! Jasper Kitten!” he shouted against the rising wind.

“Jump start it, Chris! Do it now!”

“I can’t! The battery is gone! Someone must have stolen it!”

Jasper Kitten hopped out of the car, his Orange stripes on full urgent alert, standing on end. He gazed under the hood with Chris and into the void where the battery had gone missing.

“Correct, Chris. A mysterious adversary has tampered with our vehicle,” confirmed Jasper Kitten, “but I’m willing to wager exactly who did this. If the Experimental Experimenter thinks for one single minute that we are going to be trapped right here, right now at the Bio Lab Pacific Northwest By Northwest with their precious cargo of genetically engineered labcats, well, I’ve got serious news for them.”

He swatted the air with a white gloved paw, with a force and ferocity previously unknown even to him, even with his specialty signature gesture so very well practiced, and took a deliberate, decisive step back from the car.

“And I do mean. Serious. News,” he reiterated. 

“Ditto, Jasper Kitten,” growled Chris, low and slow. 

Snow swirled around them and the wind died down and then, in the still of the night, an engine rumbled and revved in the distance and they looked up in time to see a set of headlights, blinding and bearing down on them.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

Poetry with Pets

Kibble based diet

Under cover of darkness

Jump start the action

By Jasper Kitten, Chris and Jojo

Thank you for reading luvluvluv Jasper Kitten, Chris, Star in Heaven Furever and Ever, and Jojo

Critters! Catch up on all of the mystery and adventure with The Case of the Jumping Gene! Book Number 3! Brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!

Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5

Critters! Catch up on all of the mystery and adventure with The Case of the Bowled Over Bowler Hat! Book Number 2!

Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5🐾Chap. 6🐾Chap.7🐾Chap. 8🐾Chap. 9🐾Chap. 10🐾Chap. 11🐾Chap. 12🐾Chap. 13🐾Chap. 14🐾Chap. 15🐾Chap. 16🐾Chap. 17🐾Chap. 18🐾Chap. 19🐾Chap. 20

The Case of the Misplaced Priority Envelope! Book Number 1!

Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5🐾Chap. 6🐾Chap. 7🐾Chap. 8🐾Chap. 9🐾Chap. 10🐾Chap. 11🐾Chap. 12🐾Chap. 13🐾Chap.14🐾Chap. 15🐾Chap. 16🐾Chap. 17🐾Chap. 18🐾Chap. 19🐾Chap. 20

The Case of the Misplaced Priority Envelope