Conversations with Critters
Walk with the animals. Talk with the animals. And the highly anticipated release of Chapter 16 of The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope.
Today, Critters, we present to you the highly anticipated release of Chapter 16 of The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope! Brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency! Previously, our Detectives made a crucial discovery of Pangolins, Chrome Plated Bells and the accompanying tune of a Sea Shanty. But what was that? That shuffling gait that came up behind them! What! Was! That!
Please, join our Core Community Cats, Jasper Kitten and Chris, for a synopsis and introductory commentary as we welcome welcome them in excellent chrome plated critter conversation.
Jasper: Hello, Critters! Thank you for coming along all of this way with our Detective Story! All the way to Chapter 16!
Chris: What.
Jasper: Exactly. What. Will. Happen. Next.
Chris: Question mark. Question mark.
Jasper: Well said, Chris. So, without further fanfare, let’s find out!
The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope
Book 1 from the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency
By Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star in Heaven Furever and Ever and Introducing Jojo
Dedicated in luvluvluving memory of Star
Chapter 16
A Light In The Dark
“Gosh, what kind of fluorescent light is that?”asked Star. “It’s so colorful, it’s practically psychedelic.”
“And similar in size to my headlamp,” calculated Jasper Kitten.
Chris prepared to pounce if, in fact, the presence before them proved nefarious.
The shuffling gait moved closer, the shadowy outline of a figure now visible to the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency.
“Is that you, Finnegan? Please, identify yourself,” declared Jasper Kitten.
”Yes,” came the reply. “Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star, I have been looking for you. At last, we meet.”
The Rhinoceros Auklet stepped into the doorway to the workshop. His clipped wing dragged on the ground while the horn on his beak emitted the most beautiful of lights.
”Gosh, Mr. Finnegan Rhinoceros Auklet, where is your Quill Pen?” inquired Star.
”Yeah, good question, Star,” said Chris, still at the ready to pounce if the situation deemed it necessary.
”My wing is too weak to hold onto it, Star,” came the solemn reply. “I left it on my desk.”
”Finnegan,” declared Jasper Kitten, “we have been deceived once already by a nefarious doppelgänger of a Rhinoceros Auklet. He proved to be a stooge for the Nefarious Perp and the illicit wildlife trafficking enterprise taking place here on Maintop Island. How do we know you are who you say you are?”
”Yeah. Prove. It. Rhino,” growled Chris low and slow.
”I understand your suspicions,” said Finnegan. “Please, I can explain.”
”We’re all ears, Rhino,” replied Chris.
The sea shanty and steady rhythm of the Pangolins at work continued while Finnegan explained his life circumstance to the Detectives.
”When I was a hatchling, stolen from my Family Nest by the Nefarious Perp, all I could do was long to fly home to my flock. But. However. The Nefarious Perp made the fundamental and essential mistake of interpreting my needs as a form of critical imprinting on him and that I would do his bidding. Furever.”
”I see,” commented Jasper Kitten. “A case of a Villain’s fragile ego if ever there was one.”
”Yes, and that has played so much into my captivity, but has also kept me one waddling step ahead of him even with my wing clipped.”
Finnegan tapped his yellow webbed toebeans to the sound of the sea shanty and paused while the lyrics rose to a crescendo.
Strike and strike, critters
Strike and strike
Rebel and rebel, critters
Da da da da da
Clipped wings will fly
High and high and higher
Da da da da da
High and high and higher
On wings to fly
Strike the bell for freedom
Finnegan returned his full and undivided attention to Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star who were still all ears, the hammering from the workshop steady in the background.
“Jasper Kitten, your name and the entire J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency has become legendary.”
“It is our honor to be of service to you in the name of truth and freedom,” mewed Jasper Kitten.
“Thank you, Jasper Kitten. Because of your world renowned reputation, even in this wild place, rugged and remote, I began to hatch a plan.”
“I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten again. “Please. Proceed, Finnegan.”
“My clipped wing has become weaker and weaker, but I found an encoded way to reach out to you and turn the Nefarious Perp’s criminal activity to my own devices and advantage.”
“For freedom,” said Star.
“For freedom,” said Finnegan. “My own freedom, it’s true, but especially for the freedom of my fellow critter captives.”
Jasper Kitten took this in with deep intent and humility. Chris shifted on his toebeans and relaxed from the previous and possible need to pounce. Finnegan’s fluorescent light flashed and reflected in Star’s eyes.
”We all need your help to get off the Islands and, in my case and the other birds, to find medical clipped wing treatment. My dream is to fly and return to my true local family. We’ve heard tale of a Sanctuary on the mainland for trafficked wildlife.”
”Yes,” confirmed Jasper Kitten. “It is known for rehabilitation and rewilding across all species and continents.”
”You mean…,” said Star.
”Are you saying…,” said Chris.
”Yes. Exactly. The Rewilding Rehabilitation & Utter Furever Free Sanctuary, known in the vernacular as RRUFFS.”
“Will they be able to fix my wing?” beseeched Finnegan.
“Their Medical Wing Specialists are the finest and most advanced in the world. I believe with all earnestness and all sincerity that you will fly again, Finnegan,” intoned Jasper Kitten.
”I am truly grateful, Jasper Kitten. For the first time since I hatched from my egg, I feel like there may be nothing but blue skies up ahead,” Finnegan gave a deep deep sigh of relief, of hope.
“Finnegan, the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency will get you, the Serval Family, the Pangolins and every other Critter held captive on the Farallones, safely out of here. I give you my word,” Jasper Kitten avowed.
“Your word is your bond, Jasper Kitten. I am sure of it as both a Scribe and a Critter,” replied Finnegan, lifting his wing a degree off the ground.
“Finnegan, my word is your bond, too. I promise. Furthermore,” Jasper Kitten swatted the air with his white gloved paw, “we will bring the Nefarious Perp and his Perp Crew to justice. We will put a stop to this international criminal enterprise. Once. And. For. All.”
“One hundred percent,” echoed Star.
“Ditto,” said Chris. “Full stop.”
“Once. And. For. All. Starts. Right. Now.” Jasper Kitten strode across the threshold into the workroom.
The Pangolins looked up at the Orange Striped Sleuth who stood before them. The singing of the sea shanty stopped like a turntable needle skidding across a vinyl record. They held onto their hammers a little longer and then, in synch, dropped them with a clang and a bang. The chrome plated bells that they were fashioning rolled off the workbench and scattered across the floor.
In the silence that followed, Jasper Kitten held up a white gloved paw in a sign of peace. One large bell rolled toward him and came to a stop against his toebeans. He scooped it up and could not help but admire the artistry and craftsmanship. The tone rang out in resonance with his voice as he held it out in front of him.
“My friends,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “We must move quickly. There is great danger lurking in the vicinity from the Nefarious Perp and his Perp Crew.”
Fear shone in their eyes. The Pangolins fidgeted in their seats, but did not budge.
“You sing of the truth. Of freedom. My friends, the freedom is your own. Now,” affirmed Jasper Kitten.
Chris and Star entered the room and spoke in whispers to Jasper Kitten.
”I see,” he said with a twitch of a whisker. “Thank you for bringing this to my immediate attention. We must be decisive in the moment.”
Jasper Kitten approached the Pangolins.
“We have received intel as to why you are still seated. Finnegan has relayed to us that you are, in fact, chained to this workbench.”
Chris inspected the chains and flexed his toe beans.
”Chris, you have already had one toebean injury too many today. We can’t risk further injury by utilizing this method of picking locks again,” stated Jasper Kitten.
Finnegan entered the room and lifted his clipped wing the best he could.
”You must use one of my Quills,” he said.
”Finnegan, it’s too much of a sacrifice,” countered Jasper Kitten. “We cannot cause you pain in order to attain the freedom of the Pangolins.”
”I have very little feeling left in my wing. Please, it’s the only way.”
Jasper Kitten gave a slow reluctant nod and accepted the feather offered to him from Finnegan.
They all let out a sigh of relief and in record time unchained each and every single Pangolin.
The group of Critters made haste to exit the workshop, led by Finnegan and his fluorescent horn light.
“Follow me, please, right this way,” said Finnegan. “My light is safe and imperceptible to Hooman eyesight.”
The Pangolins crowded behind Finnegan, eager to proceed.
“Hoomans do not have the development to perceive UV light,” Finnegan added to help the Pangolins adjust to their first steps toward freedom. “Nor do they have the innate capacity to fluoresce.”
“We are grateful that your horn glows in the dark, Finnegan,” said Jasper Kitten. “Cats and dogs also see UV light. For this we are most grateful to you and your horn.”
“You are welcome. It has served me well during my lifelong captivity in the bunker. I have learned my way around and avoided all detection from the Nefarious Perp.”
“Finnegan, we must continue to rely on your knowledge of the bunker floor plan. Where is the Nefarious Nursery for the Baby Orangutans and the Aviary for all of the Clipped Wing Parrots?”
“They are quite close, I assure you.”
Chris and Star stood by with the Pangolins while Finnegan led Jasper Kitten to an adjacent wall and another lever embedded in the floor. He depressed it with his yellow webbed toebeans.
A sliding door opened onto the cramped room of Orange Furbabies. More than a dozen Baby Orangutans took one look at Jasper Kitten with his own Orange coat and bonded with him on sight.
“Animal magnetism,” said Finnegan.
“Yes,” mewed Jasper Kitten.
He cradled the babies in his arms, soothing them with his white gloved paws. He carried each one with great care and tenderness, as did Chris and Star, until they were all removed, again in record time, from the Nefarious Nursery.
Jasper Kitten turned back to Finnegan.
“And the Aviary?”
“Here,” said Finnegan.
They moved to the next wall and repeated the maneuver with another lever embedded in the floor.
The room that opened up was filled with colors to rival Finnegan’s fluorescent horn. Greens and yellows, blues and reds fluttered and flapped as they caught a first glimpse of freedom.
Jasper Kitten returned to Chris and Star who continued to cradle and soothe the Baby Orangutans. The Detectives consulted with each other over the full and ginormous scale of the Critter Rescue Operation now before them and came to a collective executive decision.
“The J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency must call for backup,” declared Jasper Kitten.
“Gosh, Jasper Kitten and Chris, I have a contact in San Francisco. He may be just the Critter to call for a captive situation on a scale like this,” confirmed Star with her can do Chihuahua attitude. “He’s nearing retirement, but is an instrumental expert in the field of Search and Rescue of Ginormous Groups.”
“Please, Star. Proceed,” replied Jasper Kitten.
Chris checked his phone for a signal and handed it to Star. With her cinnamon brown paw, she entered the number and waited for the connection.
“San Francisco Sheriff's Canine Unit, Muttville Division. Sergeant Detective Jojo, speaking,” barked the voice on the other end of the line.
🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾
Poetry with Pets
A shuffling gait
The colors of the rainbow
And risks of freedom
By Jasper Kitten, Chris & Jojo and with luvluvluv for Star




Critters! Catch up on all of the mystery and adventure with Chapters 1-15 of The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope! Brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!
Chap. 1🐾Chap. 2🐾Chap. 3🐾Chap. 4🐾Chap. 5🐾Chap. 6🐾Chap. 7🐾Chap. 8🐾Chap. 9🐾Chap. 10🐾Chap. 11🐾Chap. 12🐾Chap. 13🐾Chap.14🐾Chap. 15
Great chapter Heidi! A reliably entertaining part of my Tuesday, thank you for writing and sharing each week.
Wow; this is a huge rescue operation. I am impressed by the teamwork and abilities of all the critters. Arya the Cockatiel is quite upset about Finnegan's clipped and injured wing.
Arya wants all birds to fly. No wings should ever be clipped. No one, no animal should be chained and forced to work. Arya is waiting for Finnegan to take his majestic flight of freedom. I, along with Arya, will be cheering him on.