Conversations with Critters

Walk with the animals. Talk with the animals. And the highly anticipated release of Chapter 10 of The Case of the Bowled Over Bowler Hat...

Mar 11, 2025

Today, Critters, we are pleased to present the highly anticipated release of Chapter 10 of The Case of the Bowled Over Bowler Hat! Brought to you right on time, right here, right now by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency! Because! It’s time for our Detective Tuesday Post! As if! As ever!

Previously! We left off with our Detectives experiencing an identity crisis of guilt by association in a family dynamic when they discovered a set of empty portrait frames. But where oh where did the Victorian Era paintings of the Purrington-Smith ancestors go go go? Please, stay tuned as our Core Community Critters Jasper Kitten, Chris and Jojo join us in excellent framed critter commentary and conversation. Take it away!

Jasper: Hello and welcome welcome, Dear Gentle Critters and Dear Gentle Readers! We are in the midst of it! And! Action!

Chris: And! Action! Is! Right! Critters! Cuz!

Jojo: What! Will! Happen! Next! It’s! Time! To! Go! Go! Go! Upstairs! And! Downstairs! Cuz! We! Luvluvluv! You! Furever!

THE CASE OF THE BOWLED OVER BOWLER HAT
BOOK 2 FROM THE J KITTEN, SLEUTH & PURVEYOR OF BRIGHT SHINY OBJECTS DETECTIVE AGENCY
BY JASPER KITTEN, CHRIS, JOJO AND STAR IN HEAVEN FUREVER AND EVER
DEDICATED IN LUVLUVLUVING MEMORY OF STAR
CHAPTER 10
BEFORE THE MORROW

Fully flummoxed, the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency fanned out in a room by room search of the Manor House. They searched upstairs and they searched downstairs for the missing Victorian Era ancestral portraits.

The afternoon ticked and tocked toward the dinner hour as the grandfather clock in the library struck hour after hour, three, four, and then five o’clock.

Jasper Kitten clutched his headlamp, prepared for the waning light of day and out of an abundance of caution lest they find themselves in deeper darker recesses of the Manor House.

With their keen olfactory senses, the Critter Detectives followed their instincts downstairs into the kitchen and found Sebastian polishing the silver, a large tray of kibble scones cooling on the counter.

Chris tapped a toebean on one of the kibble scones, but quickly withdrew from the touch, hot hot. He turned away from the tray and ambled over to the wall by the big cast iron stove. Fish stew simmered in a pot and a ladle rested between it and a stack of bowls.

“Dinner will be served in the Tea Room shortly,” said Sebastian. “As soon as I complete the banquet room setup for the guests arriving in the morrow.”

“Thank you, Sebastian,” nodded Chris. He opened a cupboard door next to the stove and caught Jasper Kitten’s attention.

Sebastian balanced a serving tray filled with silverware, plates and goblets, a tea set and cloth napkins and exited the kitchen.

“What is it, Chris?” asked Jasper Kitten, standing by the stove.

“It’s a dumbwaiter, Jasper Kitten,” tapped Chris with a toebean on the open door. He hopped inside. “Why, I wonder where this goes.”

“Gosh, it seems clear that we can rule out the banquet room or Sebastian wouldn’t have been carrying that big heavy tray laden with the setup for the arriving guests in the morrow,” surmised Star.

“Yes, I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “Please, Chris. Proceed.”

Chris pressed his toebeans against the walls of the dumbwaiter.

“It feels like a secure unit, Jasper Kitten,” assessed Chris and sat down.

“Gosh, this dumbwaiter sure is old, but I don’t see a rope and pulley system for it,” barked Star as she peered inside. A motor started to whirr. “Maybe it has a weight activated sensor, Chris.”

The dumbwaiter clanked and rocked from side to side. Chris spread his toebeans in a sudden attempt to balance himself and the dumbwaiter lifted up up up.

“Gosh, having a weight activated sensor is a real innovation and convenience,” commented Star.

“Yes, I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten again as the dumbwaiter lurched and churned with Chris onboard.

Chris called down the dumbwaiter shaft.

“It looks like I’m in the attic!” his voice reverberated below to the Critters, alert and all ears.

“Chris, can you send the dumbwaiter back down?” Jasper Kitten called back.

“Affirmative, Jasper Kitten! Wait a minute! Hey! There’s no switch up here! Star, is there a wall switch you can hit with your cinnamon brown paw?” came the interrogative echo.

“On it!” she barked and leaned into the recessed switch.

The empty dumbwaiter rocked back down to the kitchen, grinding to a halt. All together, Jasper Kitten, Star and Jojo, Clementine and Petal crowded inside and they began the climb toward Chris.

They hopped out into the stale and stuffy attic air, a puff of dust rising around their toebeans as they landed one by one onto the creaking floorboards. Piles of furniture, boxes and crates, rolled up rugs and broken bookcases, suitcases and trunks filled the room. A bare bulb cast the only light from overhead.

“Gosh, I wonder what kind of glitch made the dumbwaiter skip the second floor,” barked Star.

“Perhaps,” replied Chris with the tap of a toebean, “there is another electrical short in the Ol’ Manor House.”

“And quite possibly rigged on purpose,” declared Jasper Kitten, swatting the dust in the air with a white gloved paw.

They peered around the packed and cluttered room.

“Critters, let’s divide up,” said Jasper Kitten. “Jojo and Cadets take this back section and Chris and Star, let’s take the front section.”

“Roger that,” barked Jojo, followed by salutes from Clementine and Petal.

They set about their teamwork, sorting and searching, scouting and scavenging.

“Gosh, that looks like an easel in the corner over there!” cried Star and pressed forward, maneuvering around piles of paint supplies, of brushes and palettes strewn and scattered on the floor, brittle and splintered.

“Jasper Kitten, you’d better take a look at this!” barked Star.

He too maneuvered through the stacks and piles with his lithe Orange striped body and gazed over Star’s shoulder. Chris leaned in with his toebeans and Jojo and the Cadets made their way from the other side of the attic, alerted by the urgency in Star’s voice.

Four rolls of canvases rested in a corner behind the easel. Jasper Kitten gathered them into his white gloved paws and Star worked with Chris to clear a larger space around them. Under the tread of their toebeans, they pushed and pulled at boxes and books, and spread an old rug across the rough hewn floor to protect the discovered paintings.

Jasper Kitten placed the canvases on the rug with the Critter Detectives all gathered round. He began to unroll them and the portraits flexed and unfurled.

“I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten, keeping his voice level. “Critters, these are still life paintings of flowers. Not a cat, much less a British Shorthair, not even a single solitary Victorian whisker, not one brush stroke, is among them.”

Their silence settled in the attic like the dust. Jasper Kitten remained stock still and the Orange stripes of his brow furrowed in abject detective dejection.

“We must focus on the valuable time remaining before the guests arrive,” declared Jasper Kitten and summoned his courage. “If my instincts serve me correctly, we have a great deal of evidence to go on already with or without the missing portraits.”

“Gosh, Jasper Kitten. You’re right about that. Therefore! What we do know is someone has something to hide. Then. And. Now,” concluded Star, the light flashing in her eyes. “And if it’s the Smooth Operator, they aren’t very nice either!”

“Correct, Star. What we do know is that the Cadets led us to the statue of one said Theo Purrington-Smith, a Victorian ancestor. And then. Based on what I detected in the registries in the library, he was in fact the Lord of the Manor in the year 1850 and the first to bear the hyphenated name. It. Is. Evident.”

“Why, that’s what we surmised from your knowing nod to us in the library when we were trying to keep Lord Archibald from passing out again,” growled Chris, loud and proud. “Cuz we coulda and we woulda asked him in a direct manner, but it was too much of a risk to his health.”

“You’re right about that, Chris. Our subtle body language is a key form of our interagency communication toward cracking the case while maintaining the well being of our Client. Clearly, Lord Archibald knows who his ancestors are, but due to his sensitivities at this time of peril and of stress and duress, we need not ask him to state the obvious,” Jasper Kitten swatted the air.

“Jasper Kitten,” saluted the Cadets, “Theo Purrington-Smith was immortalized in stone. Furever.”

“Correct, Clementine and Petal. If my instincts serve me correctly, when we find the missing portraits, and I promise you, we will find them, Theo Purrington-Smith will be first and foremost among the ancestors. The question in my mind, but however, is what terms was Theo on with Reginald? And who else had guilt by association?”

“Jasper Kitten. We. Must. Carry. On,” barked Star with all of the muster of her can do Chihuahua attitude. “Let’s get out of here!”

Star spied the attic door on the wall opposite to them. She shuffled and scuffled her way through the clutter and turned the knob with her cinnamon brown paw.

“Gosh, this door won’t budge. It probably hasn’t been open open opened in a very long time,” she assessed the locked room situation.

Jojo joined her at the door which would not budge and gave the knob a twist and a tug and then a serious shove.

“It’s locked now for sure. From. The. Inside,” he bark bark barked as the knob snapped and broke off and clattered onto the floor.

He removed the skeleton key to the Situation Room from his pocket and tried it in the lock, but it would not turn.

Jojo picked up the doorknob and held it high over his head.

“I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “In that case, we’ll be taking the dumbwaiter.”

The Critter Detectives loaded into the dumbwaiter, their individual and collective weight automatically activated the motor with a clang and a bang and they rode it back down to the kitchen, right on time to hear Sebastian ring the dinner bell.

They filed into the Tea Room and hopped into their chairs at the table. Chris gave the Lazy Susan a spin with a toebean and they reached for their servings of steaming fish stew and a round of kibble scones and tea. A contemplative and quiet moment passed between them as they chowed down.

“Critters,” mewed Jasper Kitten as they crunched and munched. “We have given our full attention to the arrival of the guests in the morrow, but once they are here, how long are they staying?”

“Gosh, Jasper Kitten, the Annual Gathering of the Royal and Incredible British Shorthair Society is typically two days and two nights,” barked Star.

Jasper Kitten sat with his spoon suspended over his bowl of fish stew and gazed into the distance.

“Exactly, Star,” he said over his spoon. “Exactly.”

Jasper Kitten dipped his spoon back into his stew and a subtle but distinct sigh arose from Chris, the Canine Unit and the Cadets.

Everyone continued eating and then Chris collected their empty dishes and cups and stacked them onto a tray that he found on a side table.

“Sebastian has enough to do without KP duty for us,” he announced and proceeded to pounce out of the Tea Room.

The Cadets caught up with him in the kitchen and helped with the clean up. Sebastian trundled into the room and came to an abrupt halt at the sight of them.

“Why, you don’t need to say a word, Sebastian,” called Chris over the stacking of the clean dishes.

“Chris, this is highly unusual and most unnecessary,” replied Sebastian.

“You’ve got enough on your plate if you know what I mean,” Chris slapped Sebastian on the back with a toebean.

“Yes, yes, well, thank you very much, I am rather busy with preparations for the Annual Gathering of the Royal and Incredible British Shorthair Society in the morrow,” said Sebastian.

“The meal was delicious and KP duty is the least we can do to thank you,” complimented Chris.

The Cadets busied themselves with stacking the cups while Chris carried on chatting with Sebastian. The characteristic Serval horizontal white marks on the backs of Clementine and Petal’s ears rose up to their highest auditory alert.

“May I inquire about the arrival of the guests, Sebastian?” purred Chris.

“Yes, of course, Chris,” said Sebastian. “As you Detectives like to say, I’m all ears.”

“Are they still expected at the top of the ten o’clock hour in the morrow here at the Manor House?”

“Yes, actually,” confirmed Sebastian.

“We’d like to do a security check of their rooms first thing in the morning,” said Chris.

“Of course, Chris, I will show you the guest rooms at your convenience. Simply ring the bell for me in the Tea Room at breakfast,” said Sebastian.

“Thank you very much, Sebastian,” said Chris with a brief nod of his head.

“I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten, stepping into the kitchen. “You are most kind and helpful to us in the line of duty, Sebastian.”

“Thank you, Jasper Kitten,” bowed Sebastian.

“Sebastian, please do keep this conversation in confidence. His Lordship and his guests need to be protected with our prudence and discretion,” nodded Jasper Kitten.

“Yes, Jasper Kitten, most certainly. And Chris and Cadets, my most sincere gratitude for your assistance.”

“You’re welcome, Mr. Butler Sebastian,” saluted Clementine and Petal as they folded the dish towels and set them on the counter by the sink. “KP duty complete.”

The Critters returned to their rooms. Jasper Kitten set his headlamp down on the night table and gave a deep deep pensive sigh and clasped his white gloved paws together.

“Gosh, Jasper Kitten, you seem kinda down,” commented Star from the doorway of their adjoining rooms.

“The hour is nigh. We have not completely cracked the case. The guests arrive in the morrow,” replied the Orange Striped Sleuth.

“We’ve done everything that we can, Jasper Kitten,” barked Jojo, “and we have made a lot of progress from neutralizing the hardwired source of the threats to finding and identifying the bog body.”

“True, Jojo,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “It is as important for detectives to rule things out as it is to rule things in, but I had so hoped to have this solved and avoid any further potential conflict that could involve the guests. Lord Archibald will not cancel the event.”

“Why, Jasper Kitten,” growled Chris, low and slow, “the arrival of the guests might be the only way we can figure this case out. Once. And. For. All. Cuz if that Smooth Operator shows up manana, I’ll headbutt ‘em. I’ll. Headbutt. ‘Em. But. Good.”

“Thank you for the reassurances Chris,” nodded Jasper Kitten.

“You’re welcome!” growled Chris, loud and proud.

“Jasper Kitten, if I may be so bold, may I please remind you of how much it took to save our family and crack the last case?” asked Clementine.

“Thank you, Clementine, and you’re right to remind me,” agreed Jasper Kitten. “Please. Proceed.”

“Cracking the case wide open open open didn’t happen all at once, but in stages of discovery and rescue,” continued Clementine. “Furthermore, Jasper Kitten, cuz you never gave up, cuz you never quit, cuz of your dedication to cracking the case in the pursuit of justice and of freedom, you saved countless more Critters beyond even our own special Serval Family.”

Cadets Clementine and Petal stood at attention before Jasper Kitten.

“Yes,” Jasper Kitten unclasped his white gloved paws and swatted the air. “It. Is. A. Process. Of. Detection.”

The entire J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency huddled and cuddled and settled in for the night. The Critters fell into a fitful sleep before the morrow and they tossed and they turned in a dreamless state until just before the impending break of dawn.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

Poetry with Pets

Upstairs and downstairs

Learn to rule it in or out

Ride the dumbwaiter

By Jasper Kitten, Chris & Jojo