Conversations with Critters

Walk with the animals. Talk with the animals. And the highly anticipated release of Chapter 17 of The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope with Sgt. Det. Jojo and the Canine Unit!

Dec 03, 2024

Today, Critters, we are pleased to present the highly anticipated release of Chapter 17 of The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope! As always, for your reading enjoyment, this incredible mystery is brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency! Hooray! Furever!

But! What will happen next? Please, join our Core Community Critters! Jasper Kitten! Chris! And Jojo in his new Senior role as he teams up with our Heavenly Star to form the Canine Unit of the Detective Agency! Please, welcome welcome them in excellent crack the case open critter conversation! Take. It. Away!

Jasper: Hello, Dear Gentle Critters and Dear Gentle Readers! Look at how far we’ve come together! It’s time for Chapter 17!

Chris: What. Will. Happen. Next. The. End. Question. Mark. Question. Mark.

Jasper: Jojo, what would you like to say for our introductory commentary?

Jojo: Thank you for the question, Jasper. My comments are as follows. Full stop. The end. And! Let’s read all about it! Because! Critters! I show up for the whole chapter!

The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope
Book 1 from the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency
By Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star in Heaven Furever and Ever and Introducing Jojo
Dedicated in luvluvluving memory of Star
Chapter 17
Canine Unit

The wait seemed interminable for the J Kitten Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency and all of the Captive Critters, but everyone remained calm and hopeful and huddled together deep within the bunker.

In record time, Sgt. Det. Jojo and his deputies arrived at Maintop Island in just under one-and-a-half hours from San Francisco. They dropped anchor from their big speedy police boat and ferried themselves to shore in their official law enforcement Zodiac, clambering onto the beach.

Star stepped into the open expanse of the beach first, her Chihuahua can do attitude on high alert even with the presence of the Law now on Farallon terra firma.

The Nefarious Perp and the Perp Crew were nowhere in sight as the light flashed in her eyes, but she approached Jojo with all due caution lest they be lurking in the vicinity.

”Gosh, Jojo, it’s good to see you again, although I wish the circumstances were by far less serious, nefarious and dire,” barked Star.

”At your service, Star,” replied Jojo with his tried and true Terrier temperament. “It’s not everyday that I hear from such an old and highly esteemed friend with so much Life Experience and Seniority.”

”Gosh, Jojo, you have clearly risen through the ranks yourself. Before you reach Full Retirement, I must thank you on behalf of the entire J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency for helping us with this Ginormous Group Rescue Operation.”

”The thanks are all mine. May I also have the privilege of being introduced to your highly esteemed colleagues of the renowned J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency?”

”But of course,” replied Star, gesturing toward the bunker with her cinnamon brown paw.

Jasper Kitten with Chris at his side, stepped onto the beach. They strode on their lithe toebeans toward Jojo and Star.

”Sgt. Det. Jojo, thank you for your quick and efficient response to our call for backup on the Farallones in order to proceed and succeed with this Ginormous Group Rescue Operation,” saluted Jasper Kitten with a white gloved paw.

“It is my sworn duty to be of service in the name of truth and justice and loyalty, Jasper Kitten. Furthermore, I must commend you and your Detectives, Chris and Star. You have clearly cracked this case wide open.”

“Thank you, Sgt. Det. Jojo. Thank you very much. If my instincts serve me correctly, I believe we have the Nefarious Perp and his Perp Crew on the run.”

”They won’t get far in this wild place, rugged and remote as it is,” confirmed Jojo, gauging the steep jagged terrain surrounded by roiling ocean waters.

“We have a large scale operation, involving babies, clipped winged injuries, and the highly trafficked Pangolins who all need safe passage to RRUFFS,” enumerated Jasper Kitten.

“In that case, allow me to commence with this police procedural at once,” commanded Jojo.

“Thank you, Sgt. Det. Jojo. Please. Proceed,” replied Jasper Kitten.

Jojo barked orders and his deputies began to lead the Captive Critters to safety with all paws on the deck of the big speedy police boat. Unencumbered of all chains, they sat together in quiet astonished anticipation of their journey to freedom and healing.

Jasper Kitten returned to Finnegan who continued to fluoresce from his horn in the darkened room of the bunker.

“You have led everyone held captive here to freedom,” praised Jasper Kitten.

“Jasper Kitten, I can’t take all the credit. Far from it,” replied Finnegan.

“It is because of you that we have come this far. It is because of you as a fine writer and a brave Rhinoceros Auklet that the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency started down the path of cracking The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope from the beginning. We owe it all to you, Finnegan.”

“I only did what anyone would do for the freedom and well being of others in such a circumstance of captivity,” stated Finnegan.

“Now, my friend, it is time for you to leave this bunker furever as did the Pangolins and all Captive Critters. Please, walk with me to the beach. From there, you will board the big speedy police boat and be taken to RRUFFS for your own safety and medical care for your wing.”

Jasper Kitten held out a white gloved paw to Finnegan, but he held his clipped wing back.

“Jasper Kitten, my work here is not done. I cannot rest, much less leave, until the Nefarious Perp and his Perp Crew are apprehended and arrested for their crimes against the animal kingdom.”

Finnegan stood with his yellow webbed toebeans firmly planted on the ground.

“I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “I understand your position and respect your feelings, but I must beg to differ. Your safety can no longer be put at risk. I will take it from here. The Nefarious Perp will be brought to justice. Please, Finnegan. Freedom is right outside the walls of this bunker. Freedom waits for you.”

“I can still help you, Jasper Kitten. I know all of the ins and all of the outs of this terrible place. We are losing precious time by waiting. I understand the inner workings of the Nefarious Perp. He is a coward at heart. He and the Perp Crew must be making their getaway as we speak,” emphasized Finnegan.

The orange stripes on Jasper Kitten’s brow furrowed in deep concentration. He considered Finnegan’s offer, his expertise and, moreover, the score he had to settle with his captor, the Nefarious Perp.

“Furthermore, Jasper Kitten, I know a shortcut and have a sneaking suspicion we can head them off before they can escape from Maintop.”

“Finnegan, the only escape route other than the beach which is now blocked by the police is the Jordan Channel with the zipline.”

“Yes, you are correct, Jasper Kitten. I can lead you and the Detectives through the secret passage that helped Rose and Petal escape,” said Finnegan. “In fact, there is an entryway to the passage in the workroom where the Pangolins toiled away.”

“Please, wait here for a brief moment, Finnegan, I must confer with Chris and Star. Sgt. Det. Jojo may also need to weigh in on this decision of utmost urgency and importance in his jurisdiction.”

Finnegan’s horn fluoresced in an arc as he nodded his head yes. Jasper Kitten ran out onto the beach while the last of the Pangolins boarded the big speedy police boat. He caught up with Chris, Star and Jojo at the water’s edge and relayed his conversation with Finnegan.

“Jasper Kitten,” barked Jojo, “my deputies can handle the big speedy police boat ride back to San Francisco and ensure that the transfer to RRUFFS is done in a safe and compassionate manner. I will stay with the rest of you.”

“Gosh. Jojo. And. Bring. The. Nefarious. Perp. To. Justice,” barked Star.

“Agreed,” barked Jojo. “I’m on the verge of retirement, but not quite yet. Let’s go!”

“Perhaps, on that note,” mewed Jasper Kitten as they all raced across the beach, “you might be so kind as to consider joining us in Private Practice after your retirement, Sgt. Det. Jojo.”

“Jasper Kitten, I am most honored by this incredible request from such a renowned Private Detective such as yourself and your Agency. However, after we’re done bringing the Nefarious Perp to justice, I’m planning on a little R & R,” said Jojo as he sprinted toward the bunker.

“We have room on our Catio Couch,” invited Chris, striding across the beach.

“In that case,” said Sgt. Det. Jojo still in a flat out run and on his very verge of retirement, “count me in.”

“My friends and highly esteemed colleagues,” mewed Jasper Kitten. “The Canine Unit of the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency starts right here. Right now.”

Jasper Kitten swatted the air of Maintop with a white gloved paw, Star howled with fierce delight and Chris flexed his toebeans deep into the sand. Jojo raced ahead, bark bark barking, and filled with a new sense of purpose with the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency.

“Now that,” said Jojo, closing in on the bunker, “is what I call, Seniority.”

He cast a knowing glance at Star and the light flashed in her eyes.

“Finnegan,” called Jasper Kitten, crossing the threshold into the bunker. “We are ready for you to lead the way. Please. Proceed.”

“Thank you, Jasper Kitten. Detectives,” fluoresced Finnegan, “follow me, please.”

They filed into the workshop and stood at a grate in the floor. Chris pried it open and cast it aside with a clatter.

Cool air flowed in the passageway as they traversed the distance over the next several minutes, a steady pace illuminated by Finnegan’s horn.

“Gosh, is this the same passageway that Rose and Petal went through during their escape from the bunker?” queried Star.

“Yes,” replied Finnegan.

“Gosh, they must have relied entirely on their whiskers, whereas we have the benefit of your horn glowing in the dark,” commented Star.

“Correct, Star. However, soon you will see daylight up ahead because I activated the hidden hatch.”

“Oh my goodness, do you think the Nefarious Perp and the Perp Crew used this same route as a means of escape?” she said.

“Nope. I’m the only one aware of this passageway and escape hatch. They had to go overland. I’m quite sure of it.”

“How did you discover it?” mewed Jasper Kitten.

“It was simply a matter of all the time spent here throughout my life. When I was younger, my wing was stronger even though it was clipped. I installed the hatch and the activation switch myself after finding this unfinished subterranean part of the bunker.”

“I see. How ingenious of you, Finnegan,” remarked Jasper Kitten.

“The construction of the escape hatch gave me a positive focus when I was allowed breaks from writing, although those were few and far between. I had only completed the activation switch shortly before the arrival of Rose and Petal.”

“The timing was purrfect, Finnegan, but wasn’t the Nefarious Perp watching your every move?” asked Chris.

“The Nefarious Perp has a high level of distractibility, especially when he is making a lot of money. During these times, I was able to avail myself of the opportunity to build my own escape hatch infrastructure. Little. By. Little.”

“Why, that Nefarious Perp has dollar signs for pupils,” growled Chris low and slow. “I’m beyond ready to shred him, injured toebean or no injured toebean.”

“In terms of the legal limits of the law,” stated Sgt. Det. Jojo, “you would be well within your rights of self-defence.”

The Critters pressed on and soon the colorful light from Finnegan’s horn began to flicker and fade in the brightening light of day.

They popped out of the escape hatch and stood on the stretch of ground by the Jordan Channel.

Jasper Kitten furrowed his orange stripe brow as four shadowy figures dangled from the zipline.

“Critters,” said Jasper Kitten. “It looks like we’ve got company.”

“After them!” cried Chris.

The Detectives charged ahead, but Finnegan could only locomote with a valiant waddle.

Jasper Kitten turned around and sped back to him.

“I’ve got you,” he mewed and scooped Finnegan into his arms.

On the precipice of the Jordan cliff, they shrugged into the harnesses. Jasper Kitten kept a firm grip on Finnegan and tucked him under his arm.

“Can you hold on tight?” he asked.

Finnegan gave a brief nod while Jasper Kitten secured the harness around both of them.

The tension on the zipline was at its maximum from the weight of the Nefarious Perp and the Perp Crew up ahead of them.

“Jasper Kitten, it’s not safe to add more weight to the line,” barked Jojo.

“But they're getting away!” Jasper Kitten exclaimed.

The Nefarious Perp, in the lead, dangled and struggled to cross over the churning waters below.

Entangled right behind him, the Perp Crew battled and shoved at each other. Their shouts rang out over the roar of the ocean.

“Everyone. At. The. Ready.” Jasper Kitten mewed under his breath and raised a white gloved paw.

They waited and watched the slow jumbled progress of the Nefarious Perp and the Perp Crew until, one by one, they touched down on Southeast Farallon Island.

“Get ready. Get set,” calculated Jasper Kitten as the last of the Perps made the crossing. “Go!”

The Critters sailed across the zipline with force and momentum, gathering speed with a strong tailwind, and closing in on the Perps with tremendous velocity.

“They may be nefarious, but look at them fumble to extricate themselves from their harnesses and each other,” mewed Jasper Kitten to Finnegan, holding him tight and shielding him as they whizzed through the air.

“Jasper Kitten, this zipline crossing reminds me of something instinctive as a seabird.”

“What is it?” asked Jasper Kitten.

“It’s a little like flying,” marveled Finnegan.

“I see,” mewed Jasper Kitten as he felt the ground rise up beneath his feet.

The Critters all landed on their toebeans and tore off their harnesses. They gave immediate direct chase, pounding down the trail. Jasper held fast to Finnegan.

They rounded a bend. Rising up before them in the distance were the Victorian cottages on the left and on the right. The Detectives ran full tilt against time to protect the Serval Family who still remained hidden and secure.

The Nefarious Perp veered toward the cottage on the left, the Perp Crew on his heels, and in their first coordinated effort on the lam, threw their full Hooman weight together against the closed front door.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

Poetry with Pets

Activation switch

Follow the path to freedom

Open escape hatch

By Jasper Kitten, Chris & Jojo in honor and luvluvluving memory of Star and her Canine Unit